Novice at the Podium
In my entire history of woman-ness, cramps have been an established Bad Thing. They are the harbingers of blood, and then they stick around a few days more to cheer on the carnage of menstruation. In the world of girl-body signals, cramps are that ugly mean kid on the playground, rooting for the bully who's primed to take a chunk of your hair.
You can understand, then, why I'm feeling so very disturbed to be experiencing cramps right now. And, not only are they cramps, but they're a variety worse than what I usually experience during a typical period. I've always gotten off pretty easy in the menstrual cramps department, so the nasty hunchback-inducing cramps I've experienced the last few days are not a big hit with me. If my doctor hadn't warned me about them at my first appointment, I think I would be having a full-on meltdown right now, but thankfully---there was a calm warning, a caution that they would be soon arriving, and not to worry. I would want to worry, everything in me would insist that something terrible was happening, but I'm not supposed to worry.
Cramping has now been elevated to A Good Thing---that thing that foretells the stretching of my uterus, the making-way for Snippet and all of her sticker books, mix tapes and Nelson posters. My doctor (and the scores of internet sites I've been surfing to further ease my mind) said that this cramping is a sign that all is going according to plan. And yet, despite the calculated efforts to retrain my brain, it's so hard not to worry. Quick trips to the bathroom for panty-checks are the only way to calm myself for even a moment, until I once again imagine I feel something scary and awful happening. The problem here is that I'm a menstrual expert, and a pregnancy novice. It's hard to tell the expert in the room to shut up and sit down, so that the kid who's still in the 101 class can take the podium.
You can understand, then, why I'm feeling so very disturbed to be experiencing cramps right now. And, not only are they cramps, but they're a variety worse than what I usually experience during a typical period. I've always gotten off pretty easy in the menstrual cramps department, so the nasty hunchback-inducing cramps I've experienced the last few days are not a big hit with me. If my doctor hadn't warned me about them at my first appointment, I think I would be having a full-on meltdown right now, but thankfully---there was a calm warning, a caution that they would be soon arriving, and not to worry. I would want to worry, everything in me would insist that something terrible was happening, but I'm not supposed to worry.
Cramping has now been elevated to A Good Thing---that thing that foretells the stretching of my uterus, the making-way for Snippet and all of her sticker books, mix tapes and Nelson posters. My doctor (and the scores of internet sites I've been surfing to further ease my mind) said that this cramping is a sign that all is going according to plan. And yet, despite the calculated efforts to retrain my brain, it's so hard not to worry. Quick trips to the bathroom for panty-checks are the only way to calm myself for even a moment, until I once again imagine I feel something scary and awful happening. The problem here is that I'm a menstrual expert, and a pregnancy novice. It's hard to tell the expert in the room to shut up and sit down, so that the kid who's still in the 101 class can take the podium.
posted by deanna at 9:15 PM
11 Comments:
Oh, De, that must be so scary! Hopefully the pain will ease up and you'll get used to it soon. I would be having the exact same reaction you are, but maybe even more so since I do tend to have extremely painful cramps with my period. I love the comment about the mix tapes, it made me laugh, but reality is that Snippet will be making iTunes playlists or some other digital variation that we don't know about yet. :)
HI Deanna,
I had bad cramps with both my kids, the 2nd being worse then the first. It's just round ligament pain stretching and softening to make room for the Snippet in there. :)
As long as there's not a ton of blood don't worry, even light spotting can be normal so don't freak, that can make it much worse!! Drink lots of water and put your feet up when you have the cramps and take some deep breaths to calm yourself. The fun is only just beginning.
Sharon
All the cramping and twinges are worrisome. I was actually at the drs first thing yesterday morning for cramps that woke me up all night long. They said they were normal...but it still freaks me out!
It's such a natural tendency to worry about the cramping. I have been telling myself all along: "If I'm not bleeding, it's OKAY." Sometimes that doesn't really ease the worry, though. Lately, I've been experiencing a shooting pain when changing position along with the cramping. Round ligament pain is a bitch.
I agree with Karen, by the time Snippet is old enough, it'll be some kind of mind-chip mixed tape :)
Congratulations. That is awesome. I just read your news as I was traveling!!!
I hated when I cramped with Aiden. Even after I'd go and hear a perfect heart beat I just worried. I'm doing the same thing with this pregnancy and even though I know it's completely normal and that it can be worse with subsequent pregnancies I'll still worry. Sadly enough I don't think we ever quit worrying, "novice" or "pro". :-)
First of all, really well-written and amusing post.
Second, THANK YOU. I started to experience some odd achey-stretching-twinge sensations about 10 minutes before I went into an interview this afternoon and now, a few hours later, it's still going on. No blood - and I'm checking for spotting like every 5 minutes. I was afraid to call my doctor because I didn't want to hear that this was bad. You and the comments have given me much relief!
Thanks, Deanna!
You have the right attitude. It is impossible to be calm when you experience this, but you know with your head that it is ok, and the dr has confirmed that. Doesn't mean that the rest of you wouldn't be freaking out over this. One other point - and hopefully this will NOT be an issue for you - but some spotting or bleeding also isn't necessarily indicative of something bad. Terribly scary, but usually ok.
I thought, when I was pregnant with Eddie, that he was the new inhabitant of my uterine condo, knocking down walls and moving furniture to get more comfy. I like your analogies better!
Hang in. The cramping will continue in some form or fashion for much of the pregnancy, but it will change in nature and won't feel like you're about to get a period.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could just enjoy these pregnancies?? Sucks that there has to be such worries along the way.
Maybe consider getting a home doppler in a few weeks so you can hear the heartbeat at home. The caveat is that if you don't find it you'd freak, and sometimes it is hard to find. If you go that route, I'd recommend babybeat.com. Most of the women I know have used it, as well as myself. I found it to be very reassuring, and if I had a problem finding it, I'd call the dr and they'd have me come in for an in-office doppler check. Needs to be at least 10 wks, though.
I had cramps for the first 13w or so!
It does sound worrisome - I had the opposite in the first trimester, bleeding without cramping, but either one can feel scary. The good thing is that it's probably fine.
Hi Deanna, I had cramping (quite nasty pains that took my breath away) and some episodes of bleeding when pregnant with my son, so I know how scary it is! Im sure its just the round ligament pain that everyone talks about.
HUGS!!
Cassandra xxx
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