Hello, I'm a Tool
Jake and I have fallen into The Parent Trap. You know, the big despicable black hole, culturally constructed by commerce to tell parents what they need to do and buy to be *good* parents. It's all mostly subtle tricks---adorable commercials, slight guilt trips, evil little hints about how much simpler or better or safer life could be. Here's just the short list of dumb crap we've done in the past few weeks as part of our descent:
1. Two weeks ago, we dumped the sedan and bought an SUV. We convinced ourselves that, with 3 dogs and loads of baby crap, we just HAD to have more room. I was chipping right in with Jake, advocating this or that small detail of convenience, and dropping bonus words like "family vacations and "huge-ass stroller." As we sat in the finance office at the dealership, I asked the salesman to leave his own office so we could have one last chance to talk ourselves out of a car payment that will be twice as high as the sedan. In the end, though we fretted for a solid 15 minutes, we jumped into it anyway. I've hardly told anyone about the car, as I feel like the world's biggest sucker for falling for the whole "have kid, must have giant car" scenario.
*ETA* For those requesting the sordid details, here's a pic of our new Chevrolet Equinox:
2. This weekend we bought a camcorder, for all the millions of endearing (though to everyone else, just annoying) family home movies we'll be filming. When I was in high school, one of my friend's moms was *that* mom---the one who followed us around immortalizing every embarrassing thing we did. It's because of her that I have 3 VHS tapes full of our teenage antics, which someday my unfortunate child will discover and learn the truth about the cheeseball line from which she was spawned.
3. This weekend we also bought a breast pump. There were lots of sensible reasons for putting it off until later in my pregnancy, but I felt this burning NEED to get it NOW. What if they're sold out when I'm ready to buy later? What if we don't have the cash later on? Lame excuses aside, mostly the burning need was due to my uber-planning personality---a desire to get things and put them in their place and be ready to go. But, did I buy the simple affordable model? Oh, noooooo.......I bought the crazy-stupid expensive one---not the hospital-grade one, of course, but the top of the line retail model. I justified it to jake until I was nearly sweating from the effort, and he mercifully cut me off, saying, "It's okay---if this makes you feel better about things, it's okay."
How does this happen? How does a girl who has survived on her own by being smart with her money suddenly turn into a financial idiot in the span of a few weeks post-BFP? And, if things are getting this stupid already, what the hell is going to happen after the kid actually arrives?
1. Two weeks ago, we dumped the sedan and bought an SUV. We convinced ourselves that, with 3 dogs and loads of baby crap, we just HAD to have more room. I was chipping right in with Jake, advocating this or that small detail of convenience, and dropping bonus words like "family vacations and "huge-ass stroller." As we sat in the finance office at the dealership, I asked the salesman to leave his own office so we could have one last chance to talk ourselves out of a car payment that will be twice as high as the sedan. In the end, though we fretted for a solid 15 minutes, we jumped into it anyway. I've hardly told anyone about the car, as I feel like the world's biggest sucker for falling for the whole "have kid, must have giant car" scenario.
*ETA* For those requesting the sordid details, here's a pic of our new Chevrolet Equinox:
2. This weekend we bought a camcorder, for all the millions of endearing (though to everyone else, just annoying) family home movies we'll be filming. When I was in high school, one of my friend's moms was *that* mom---the one who followed us around immortalizing every embarrassing thing we did. It's because of her that I have 3 VHS tapes full of our teenage antics, which someday my unfortunate child will discover and learn the truth about the cheeseball line from which she was spawned.
3. This weekend we also bought a breast pump. There were lots of sensible reasons for putting it off until later in my pregnancy, but I felt this burning NEED to get it NOW. What if they're sold out when I'm ready to buy later? What if we don't have the cash later on? Lame excuses aside, mostly the burning need was due to my uber-planning personality---a desire to get things and put them in their place and be ready to go. But, did I buy the simple affordable model? Oh, noooooo.......I bought the crazy-stupid expensive one---not the hospital-grade one, of course, but the top of the line retail model. I justified it to jake until I was nearly sweating from the effort, and he mercifully cut me off, saying, "It's okay---if this makes you feel better about things, it's okay."
How does this happen? How does a girl who has survived on her own by being smart with her money suddenly turn into a financial idiot in the span of a few weeks post-BFP? And, if things are getting this stupid already, what the hell is going to happen after the kid actually arrives?
posted by deanna at 7:16 PM
18 Comments:
You rock! The Economy thanks you!
What kind of SUV did you get?
I can totally relate here! I think it's all normal- you just want to be prepared for when the little one arrives! It's better to be prepared early, than be caught after the fact with nothing that you need, right? ;)
Ohhhhhhh man. I can't beleive what I'm reading. An SUV??? Where did the Deanna I know go?? Jeremy says you can offset your carbon emissions by buying a scooter ;)
Wow, an SUV? I never would have thought! Josh is actually talking about our next car for the same reasons (2 dogs!) and he's thinking about the Mazda 5, which is like a cross between a minivan and a sedan. Weird. About the camcorder, just make sure Jake knows how to work it, because you'll be too tired! :) You are NOT a tool. :)
LOVE the new vehicle - VERY nice!!
We did similar things. We bought a new digital camera, which was a fabulous buy and we've probably taken about 2000 pics of Aiden over the last year. We could not have accomplished that with our old, regular film camera. Oh and of course it also has a video feature, which I love because I don't have to mess with discs or tapes if I don't want to.
I also bought my breast pump when I was about 6 months or so along. I wanted to get it when I had the money and found it on sale. Of course I got the top of the line (Pump In Style Advanced) and if that's what you got then let me just tell you it is completely, 100% worth it. Seriously. I breastfed Aiden for his first year, which of course meant pumping at work for 10 months. The excellent pump was what made it possible and I will be forever grateful that I bought it. Heck, now that G has new insurance they actually pay $100.00 towards a breast pump and I'm seriously considering getting another one so that I can keep one at work and one at home. It which would be SO much more convenient than carrying it back and forth.
Anyway, didn't mean to go on and on but I think you've made GREAT, SMART buys. Yay!!
Oh dear, that is one slippery slope. My advice to you: turn off the television for the next twelve months. You don't need half that crap they advertise.
And the huge-ass stroller? We've used ours only a handful of times in 10 months. I hate it. I bought an umbrella stroller for $15 and I keep it in my car. I've used that more times than I can count. Love it.
Simplify, my friend!
Just remember...
The ONLY things that you need to have a safe, healthy, happy baby is common sense, love, and time.
BRANDY: Yep, I'm all hooked up with the Pump in Style (and trying to drill the price out of my head!)Everywhere I researched, people kept saying "It's the must-have for working moms," so I took the bait.
HAPPY 2ND TRIMESTER!!!!
I think it is great that you guys are getting started with the planning. I registered for the PIS myself. It's the only pump that is really worth it, so I've been told.
And I'm an SUV gal myself so I love the new ride. XOXO
You so won't regret the SUV. We went from a Saturn (small) to a Mitsubishi Galant (full size sedan) and still didn't have enough room for all the baby crap. Even last summer when we went on vacation we were packed to the gills, and Brody was 2 1/2!
PS- The Pump in Style is more or less hospital grade. Both have enough suction to suck your soul out through your nipples. ;)
They all sound like fairly practical purchases to me. I will, however, start worrying when you pony up big money for a diaper wipe warmer. ; )
An SUV! Blimey. I.. I don't know what to say. I'm laughing with you, not at you...
But the urge to get the very very very best for your baby is completely and utterly understandable, even wonderful.
It is totally ok, totally normal, and you are giving in to the excitement. And you're not alone!! We got a Pilot - an 8 passenger - since we had the teenager, the au pair, the baby, the stroller (and we LOVED our chicco stroller and car seat system and used it ALL the time even though now we're on to an umbrella stroller, but it's still not so small if you want something really comfy). Re: breast pump, your titties and milk will thank you that you got a good one. And stare at it with excitement and anticipation until you need it. Get this - I got a sample diaper in the mail once I got on the lists - and I kept it on my desk and smelled it through the whole pregnancy! Of course, it smelled a lot nicer clean and on my desk then the ones that currently reside on Eddie's butt...
And the camcorder - you will thank yourself in later years. You want these memories.
You are doing what every parent or parent-to-be does - debt debt debt and baby stuff :)
Enjoy the excitement, but be careful - it can be like eating M & Ms :)
Oh, and you are SO not a tool. You are an excited mom-to-be - enjoy!!!!!
LOL. I'm in awe of you (and eyeing our sedan suspiciously from the bedroom window). I'm not even sure what a breast pump looks like or costs. Do you think I should get one too? Like now?
That's why I love your blog. You're a few weeks ahead of me (and infinitely more informed), so I get all the necessary heads up. Thanks to you I didn't completely lose my shit when I started getting crampy around six weeks.
Open Door, indeed!
Nah, you'd only be a tool if you'd bought a Hummer!
We actually (as prospective adoptive parents) did the same thing. We traded in our truck (that we paid off 6 months ago) for a used mid-size SUV (that we'll pay on for the next 4 years) because it would be more practical when we do get a baby. Now we have a second car payment on top of paying on the huge loan we took out to pay for the adoption on top of when we get a kid, paying for kid stuff! We're fricking geniuses, all of us!!
ughhh...it happens! we are, for better or worse, americans and buying things helps us to cement an event. that it happened, or is happening. i think it is ok, and wonderful that you are looking to the future!
ughhh...it happens! we are, for better or worse, americans and buying things helps us to cement an event. that it happened, or is happening. i think it is ok, and wonderful that you are looking to the future!
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